Who Is the Laziest 誰(shuí)最懶

Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?

Tom: I don't know, father.

Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?

Tom: Our teacher, father.

父親：哎，湯姆，今天我跟你們老師談過(guò)，現(xiàn)在我想問(wèn)你個(gè)問(wèn)題。你們班上誰(shuí)最懶？

湯姆：我不知道，爸爸。

父親：啊，不對(duì)，你知道！想想看，當(dāng)別的孩子們都在做作業(yè)、寫字時(shí)，誰(shuí)在課堂上坐著，只是看人家做功課？

湯姆：我們老師，爸爸。

But the teacher cried 可是老師哭了

The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled（被寵壞的） . His father knew it, but his grandma doted on him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum（亂發(fā)脾氣） . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.

When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.

Was school all right? she asked, Did you get along all right? did you cry?

Cry? John asked. No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!

六歲的約翰嬌生慣養(yǎng)。他的父親知道這一點(diǎn)，可他的祖父母仍然寵著他。這孩子幾乎寸步不離他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是鬧。他第一天上學(xué)才離開祖母的懷抱。

約翰放學(xué)了，他奶奶在門口接他并問(wèn)道：學(xué)校怎么樣？你過(guò)的好嗎？哭了沒(méi)有？

哭？約翰問(wèn)，不，我沒(méi)哭，可老師哭了。

兒子：媽媽，上帝是白人還是黑人？ 

媽媽：寶貝，上帝是白人也是黑人！ 

兒子：那上帝是男人還是女人？ 

媽媽：寶貝，上帝是男人也是女人！  

兒子：哦。我知道了，上帝是邁克爾•杰克遜！

His Fault 他的錯(cuò)

Billy: Mother, Bobby broke a window.

Mother: How did he do it?

Billy: I threw a rock at him and he ducked.

比利：媽媽，波比打壞了窗玻璃。

媽媽：他怎么打的？

比利：我向他扔石頭，他躲開了。

Like father, like son 有其父必有其子

Son: Papa, what's the meaning of " Like father, like son"?

Father: Bastard. What another scandalous thing have you done in the school?

兒子：爸爸，“有其父必有其子”是什么意思呀？

父親：狗崽子，你在學(xué)校又干什么見不得人的事啦？

They're Busy 他們很忙

One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered.

"May I speak to your parents? "

"They're busy. "

"Oh. Is anybody else there? "

"The police. "

"Can I speak to them?"

"They're busy. "

"Oh. Is anybody else there? "

"The firemen. "

"Can I speak to them? "

"They're busy. "

"So let me get this straight -- your parents, the police, and the firemen are there, but they're all busy? What are they doing?"

"Looking for me. "

 電話鈴響了，小男孩接了電話。

“請(qǐng)你父母聽電話好嗎？”

“他們很忙。”

“噢，那家里還有其他人嗎？”

“還有警察。”

“我可以和他們說(shuō)話嗎？”

“他們很忙。”

“那還有其他人嗎？”

“還有消防員。”

“我可以和他們說(shuō)話嗎？”

“他們也很忙。”

“請(qǐng)直接告訴我——你的父母、警察和消防員都在你家，但他們都很忙，他們到底在干什么？”

“在找我。”